Tuesday, 14 January 2014

This "Growing Up" Business

I have recently finished high school, which in and of itself feels strange to say because I feel like I finished High School about 3 years ago. Nevertheless, I have been "thrust" into the 'real world' which seems to be a pretty cool place. The sensation that you feel when you realize that your life is at your fingertips is a complete rush that is both exhilarating and debilitating at the same time. You feel young enough to do anything that you can imagine and by the same token, too young to do anything at all. You have this hunger for life and money and love and experience and at the same time all you want to do is sleep until 1pm and eat cereal for dinner in a baggy T-shirt and underwear. Everyone your age is blasting into different directions - some make you sad and others… could blast to another planet and that wouldn't be far enough. We're all confused and excited and trying to put on these brave and invincible masks to convince our friends and families that we have our *for lack of a better word* sh*t together. All the while praying that we can eventually convince ourselves.

Everyone starts high school tomorrow and it feels bloody fantastic that while they are being intimidated by workloads and deadlines I will be having lunch with my friends and then going out for drinks. But apart from these wonderful social things - that we can now do from 8am to 3pm for the first time except for school holidays #adulthood - a lot more of our time is devoted to contemplating our futures and money and serious things like *how long will my parents be willing to pay for my petrol(gas)????* or *am I studying the right degree… at the right university… in the right city…* These kind of thoughts made me think of you tuber Danisnotonfire's video called "College Dropout". Suddenly school seems safe. You only have to worry about the next exam or speech. Nothing further. Now our entire lives are spanning in front of us in multiple directions and well… that is why we all drink so much.

I'll be the first to say that I am afraid of the mysteriously unknown future. But I have had two month of complete 'independence' and I have already encountered the strangest experiences that would seem so normal to people of an older generation but is totally bizarre to us. Things like my first job interview or booking your own appointments and keeping diaries and to-do lists.

On top of all my blogging ideas - like documenting my Eurotrip that I did in December/January - I feel like sharing my struggle of growing up and establishing my own place in the world seems like a witty idea. What do you think?

Also, I cut off half my hair cause I felt like a school girl with it :D